The last six months of 2008 have been one of the greatest shows on earth! No movie, Superbowl, Olympics, Brad and Angelina, Brittany Spears or Royal Birth can compare to the spectacular, outrageous, full-blown television advertising windfall officially referred to as the Presidential Primaries. And the actual election is yet to come!

But with only six months left to go, television producers are already dreading the post presidential election blues, anticipating plunging plunder, pundit prostration and poor-house paranoia. The dilemma will be how to continue beating the dead horse once the election is over. They must be debating which scenario will be the most financially beneficial to their own bottom line.

For instance, if Senator Obama wins, he most likely will appoint Senator Clinton the Secretary of Perseverance and President Clinton the Ambassador to Somalia. Senator McCain will finally be able to retire and go on the road with Wilford Brimley as the Diabetic Duo promoting Liberty Mutual.

Or…if the Clintons win, Obama can start his own church and McCain will be named Miss Congeniality.

But if McCain wins, Hillary and Barack will be able to star in their own reality program, a campaign spinoff called RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT! If you think Hillary’s rich now…! The show would be a cross between Survivor and American Idol. The gloves are off! Howard Dean could be the host, exhorting and analyzing as each senator is cast into embarrassing situations; such as having their credit card refused by the waitress at Denny’s, forgetting that Columbus discovered America, not George Soros, and mud wrestling with Karl Rove dressed up as Truman Capote.

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Both Hillary and Barack would compete in games like Duck Hunting with Dick, The Chad Race against George and Al, or Hide and Seek with Reverend Wright and Ex-president Bill.

Imagine the tempting promos; Will Chelsey ever come home? Does Barack wear brown contact lenses? Is it politically incorrect for Barack to say, “May the best man win.”?

The reality show RUNNING FOR PRESIDENT! could keep them both in the spotlight until McCain is ready to throw in the towel and turn over all responsibility to his vice president, The Ghost of Strom Thurmond, who still walks the sacred Halls of Congress…or so I’m told. ANM