Current Progressive Dairyman digital edition
Advertisement
breadcrumbs

Tim Moffett

Tim Moffett is a Florida dairyman and stand-up comedian. Read his humorous take on the dairy industry in his regular column, "The Manure Spreader."

LATEST

A dairy farmer friend of mine told me that on his farm, “They don’t have preventative maintenance; they have crisis management.”

Read more ...

A famous Hollywood superstar has just declared their New Year’s resolution was to become a farmer. Said person’s reasoning was to enjoy nature, live off only the food they grow for themselves and live a simpler life.

Read more ...

Have you ever wonder how Santa Claus can eat 2 million pounds of cookies in a 12-hour period and not end up in a diabetic coma?

Read more ...

At Thanksgiving dinner, always remember to compliment the chef. Just know that if you compliment your mother-in-law on the “turkey neck,” be sure she knows you meant the actual turkey. Tryptophan in turkey will only make you tired, but a mother-in-law has the ability to “put you to sleep” permanently.

Read more ...

We all know farming is a gamble. We roll the dice every day. We try to count cards and figure the odds on seed prices to butterfat, or fuel prices to pork bellies, and everything in between.

Read more ...

Answer me this: Why at “retirement parties” do they give the retiree a new watch? At this point in their lives, do they really need a watch? If there were such a thing as a retirement party for a farmer, and he received a watch, chances are he would shoot the rooster the next day. The rooster didn’t retire, but the hand of the watch terminated his job.

Read more ...