Anytime you need to communicate with others to get the job done, you risk hurt feelings, anger and misunderstanding. And the results – or lack thereof – from poor communication can have economic consequences for your dairy business, as well as take an emotional toll.

Freelance Writer
Tamara Scully, a freelance writer based in northwestern New Jersey, specializes in agricultural a...

But not if you have the right tools. This message was the focus of a workshop given by Dr. Lisa Holden, associate professor of dairy sciences at Penn State University. Holden was a presenter at the recent 2015 Penn State Dairy Cattle Nutrition Workshop.

Her presentation was an abbreviated overview of an extension dairy course. The course was designed to take the development of successful negotiating skills and present them in a manner that is relevant to the daily situations encountered on a dairy.

“How do we take these principals [of negotiation] and adjust them to what we see in a dairy on a daily basis?” Holden asked when designing Penn State Extension’s half-day dairy training program, “You Get What You Negotiate.”

The Penn State Extension course, based on the book Getting to Yes: Negotiating Agreement Without Giving In, written by Roger Fisher and William Ury, offers dairy industry professionals – farmers, owners, managers, nutritionists, workers – the opportunity to build the skills needed to better communicate their concerns and optimize results.

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Communication

Negotiation is all about clear communication. When emotions flare, the message you are trying to communicate often goes unheard or becomes misinterpreted. By utilizing a few techniques, dairy professionals can streamline common day-to-day communication issues and more effectively meet the needs of their operation while resolving any conflicts.

Holden utilized hands-on training, having participants enact realistic scenes involving dairy farmers involved in some typical situations where negotiating skills can come in handy. First, a dairy owner, upset with a change in his herd’s performance, tried to communicate his needs to a busy nutritionist. Other scenarios included a feed dealer seeking payment from a dairy farmer with financial concerns, a disagreement between two brothers sharing responsibilities on the dairy farm and a dairy owner discussing a production problem with an employee.

In each situation, Holden demonstrated that the tenets of effective communication are the key to resolving the issue of concern without undue conflict. For situations where a resolution was not reached, no matter how good the negotiating skills, Holden offered participants a way of measuring whether to “cut losses” or find a way to live with the differences.

Steps to negotiation

Holden advised that separating the problem from the people involved is crucial to effective resolution. Clearly stating the problem at hand, without blaming anyone, and asking for input to resolve it is the first step. Focusing on and targeting the common interest of both parties, and approaching the issue as one that needs to be resolved mutually, gets results.

When the parties involved feel secure in voicing their opinions and are free to provide constructive input to address any concerns, resolution is more likely to occur than in emotionally charged situations when anger, frustration and hurt feelings dominate. Listening to the input from the other party and taking time to consider various options leads to positive results. Having objective criteria that are clearly communicated and a willingness to consider a variety of ways in which your goals can be reached often leads to solutions agreeable to both parties involved.

“It’s not in anybody’s interest” if parties take stands, Holden explained. Deciding whether an issue is a “one-time deal” or a “perennial problem” can help clarify your concern and determine if a major change is needed or if something that normally runs smoothly has encountered an issue and can be resolved readily before it becomes an ongoing issue.

Tough choices

Sometimes negotiations break down. Perhaps the other party refuses to consider any options. Or they may refuse to admit there is a problem at all. There could be an imbalance of power, intentional deceit or simply a lack of ability to change, which is hindering resolution.

“What are you willing to do? What are you not willing to do? What’s your bottom line?” are important questions to answer before giving into a stalemate, Holden said.

Sometimes rather than settle or continue on with the status quo, walking away and breaking ties is the only option that makes sense. At other times, finding an alternate resolution as a best second option will allow you to continue the relationship in a satisfactory manner.

But before tough negotiations stall completely, try to approach the situation in a different way. Allowing the other party – who may not think you have a valid concern – the opportunity to approach the situation from a different angle could be an alternative path to your initial end goal. Simply asking the other party about any concerns they may have, and what their expectations may be, can refocus the situation.

In the end, if no satisfactory agreement can be reached and the other party is closed to all options, tough choices need to be made.

“Recognizing you’ve tried these different things and you’re not getting there” requires a decision, Holden said. You’ll have to “live with it or walk away.”  PD

Tamara Scully, a freelance writer based in northwestern New Jersey, specializes in agricultural and food systems topics.